All perfect praise be to Allah, The Lord of the Worlds. I testify that there is none worthy of worship except Allah and that Muhammad is His slave and Messenger.
Most scholars are of the view that the consent of the guardian is a condition for the validity of the marriage, and this is the view that we adopt here in Islamweb.
It is not valid for a woman to marry herself off: there is no difference in this whether she is virgin or deflowered (already married), young or old.
Therefore, the contract that took place between you and that man is not valid. However, it is not permissible for you to marry another man except after divorce or invalidation of the marriage contract.
Ibn Qudaamah said:
"If a woman is married a void marriage, it is not permissible to marry her off to another man than her husband until he divorces her or that her marriage is invalidated [by the judge]. If he [her husband] refuses to divorce her, then the ruler invalidates his marriage. This is explicitly stated by Ahmed. Ash-Shaafi’i said: “There is no need for invalidating the marriage, or for divorce, because it is a marriage that is not concluded; it is like the marriage during the waiting period.” [End of quote]
Therefore, if this man does not agree to divorce you or agree to your Khul’, and you cannot take him to the judge so that he will invalidate the contract, then, in this case, we do not see any harm in acting according to the view of ash-Shaafi'i in considering this contract as void and that it does not require divorce or invalidation (by the judge).
Allah knows best.